“Try to find your own oasis“, George concluded.

Oasis? As per the free online dictionary, Oasis means “a place or state of peace, safety, or happiness in the midst of trouble or difficulty”. After a discussion with George over many subjects on April 24th, our topics revolved around our present & future goals, our mutually shared desire for travelling, & around our overall happiness. The following depicts a small portion of our interaction fitted into an interview-like format while leaving the flow of our discussion & the words said in their original or pristine state. Prior to exploring our communication journey, allow me to introduce my dear friend.

About Him: George is a 27 years old man who graduated from the John Molson School of Business at Concordia University. He has been working as an inside sales executive for 2 years and a half with a company when things recently changed! Indeed, George recently took a risk, the risk to leave his current position for luck of excitement. Fascinated with learning and speaking more than 5 languages, passionate & motivated to frequently travel & explore the world, today, George decides to take on a new journey to explore the world of opportunities! Below, you will find my questions, his answers!

Happiness? What is it for you?
“It is something that brings you to a zenith. It’s like an orgasm of emotions.”

Orgasm of emotions? Interesting! What makes you reach such orgasm of emotions?
“Happy thoughts, positive energy & being with people you care. It’s also possible through exploration”.

What was/is one the happiest moment in your life & why?
“When I felt salty water again for the first time in 10 years. It was like revisiting my youth. A time where one has no responsibilities, no worries”.
…
Tell me something; anything linked to our current topic
“My mind always travels” he answers with a smile.

Please elaborate
“Even if I’m here now, I’m always in a foreign place. Always trying to put different scenarios, somewhere else. It is like playing mind games. Happiness is reached through experience and experience through spending time with people whom you care for”.

Where is your mind now?
“Given the bad weather, my mind is in another place”. After asking to provide me with a detailed image description, George replied: “Pear trees, a beach, siting on a terrace having coffee in a teeshirt, this is what I see now”.

Any feelings attached to such images?
“When I am sad, it makes me sadder. But when I’m already happy, these images make me happier”.

How do you cope with negative emotions/attitudes/thoughts?
“I try to erase them but they are always there so you need to fight against them and weigh with the positive. It can be compared to a scale game”.
…
In few words, how would you conclude?
“Try to find your own oasis”.

Oasis? Mind travels? Orgasms? No responsibilities? Games? Exploration? These are few of the many words that can be picked from our long & yet interesting discussion.

Picture note: Taken the day after our coffee meeting. Mission: Free to choose how & where to take a picture & represent the concept of liveuphoria! Result <3! Thanks for agreeing to share your pictures & have our words & good moments published :)

Oasis and Opportunities: Afterthoughts & final remarks
So how does George “try to find his own oasis”? As he mentioned earlier: “happy thoughts, positive energy & being with people he cares” is a way for him to reach it, which he also refers to as an “orgasm of emotions”, more commonly known as happiness. He also adds by saying that happiness is “possible through exploration”. But exploration of what? Exploration of the world? Of the self? The 1st word that came to my mind: Wanderlust. According to the free online dictionary,

Does he seek to explore or does he have wanderlust? Not only does he speak about the happy benefits of exploration but my friend also refers to frequent mind traveling.“Even if I’m here now, I’m always in a foreign place”, it is like playing mind games”. Signs of wanderlust? Probably! We can further assume that he is representing wanderlust as the mind game, in which the winner is rewarded with happiness. But how many players are there in his game? Is he really the only player or could he playing against player #2: Reality?

Game for two?
“A time where one has no responsibilities, no worries” is how he describes one of the happiest moments in his life. Although chilhood memories vary from one person to another, we may all agree that we experienced one or many wonderful & playful times which we today label as great happy moments. Responsibilities & worries are part of our daily lives but they are hidden or absent when daydreaming. So the question now is: if he is defining his happiest moment as a time free from worries, can constant mind traveling be, to a certain extent, “escapelust”? How often, how far & how long can one truly leave or escape for?

When asked him how he felt about his mind vacations, George replied: “when I am sad, it makes me sadder. But when I’m already happy, these images make me happier”. It is interesting to see how his mind’s strong impulse to travel and explore the world may have positive & negative impacts on his feelings. Do feelings mark the departure &/or the arrival? Or could maybe his mental images be variables influencing the valence of his emotions? Let’s first see how he copes with his negative emotions. “I try to erase them but they are always there so you need to fight against them and weigh with the positive. It can be compared to a scale game”. Mind & Scale Games… Since his “scale game” consists of fighting against negative emotions & if we decide to see his “mind game”, as elaborated earlier, as the fight against reality, then can we go head & assume that reality makes him sad? After all, don’t we or wouldn’t we all enjoy escaping from reality by taking few weeks and even months of vacations?

The objective of this reflection is not to answer the questions but rather to ask more questions. In sum, even if every single one of us copes with negative circumstances & thoughts differently, the important thing is to find the healthy solution that works best for the self. I can assert that this 27 years old man has found his way. Who said daydreaming did us any wrong anyway? Daydreaming is similar to visualization. Both can motivate & lead to ambitions & determination to realize such images. I personally think that my long time friend George has found his oasis or his Zenith & today, he is taking the time, the risk, the opportunity to further explore, nurture & maintain it. Make the best out of your life journey, wishing you permanent oasis & beautiful opportunities. Have safe flights :)

Answers, comments & questions are welcomed!
What represents your own oasis?
How would you represent liveuphoria?
If interested in sharing how you define & liveuphoria feel free to do so!

“Shoes make me happy. I’m superficial. Whatever” – Taline

This quote represents the concluding words iterated by my friend after an interesting discussion regarding branding & labels.

A discussion about brands? Why not? Taline & I both share a passion for luxurious brands. As consumers of more luxurious brands it definitely is a topic which we both truly enjoy. (Taline’s luxury consumption > my luxury consumption). Thus, the purpose behind the following is not only to give the reader a brief & detailed presentation of our discussion but to present this interesting subject based on her experience as a consumer, complimented with my academic background in psychology & my current graduate studies in Marketing. Before proceeding with a short review of our talk, allow me to briefly present my 8 years long friend Taline to you.

About her: Taline is an account executive for Se Ce apparel for nearly 5 years. Se Ce apparel is  ”the exclusive Canadian distributor of high-end fashion brands for men, women and children, including UGG® Australia, 7 For All Mankind®,  Splendid®, House of Harlow, Belle Noel” & many more brands (Se Ce apparel Website, 2012). Her role consists of long hours of paperwork, working in collaboration with colleagues & travelling. Indeed, Taline has very frequent business trips across Canada & to the United States. When I asked her if she enjoyed the business traveling opportunity, she replied: ” at first I did! But it’s not at all as it seems. It’s not as glamorous”. Regardless, she still enjoys the network of people in her business surrounding & is a firmly motivated accomplishment seeker. Below, you will find some of the questions that i asked her concerning our shared passion for branding/labels, April 20th 2012.

How do you define your relationship with brands/labels?
“I’m all about labels & love; no label, no love. It is a sad reality but it really comes down to that. Taline then provides me with an example: “this shirt that I am wearing (in the picture) cost me 300$. It makes me feel better. It’s not for anyone, it’ for me. I really feel much better when I buy such things. It’s the business that I am in that made me into this monster”.

What’s your most expansive purchase?
Louboutin Shoes for 900$! (Picture of the shoes in question, taken by Taline after our discussion)

Why did you make this purchase?
“They are beautiful but also the most uncomfortable”.

So why is it that you wear them? How do they make you feel?
“I wear them because they are Louboutin’s & they just make me feel fabulous”. 

Are you considering  repurchasing another pair?
“Planning, yes”.

Labels and Love: Afterthoughts & final remarks
As presented at the beginning of this article, Taline concluded by saying: “shoes make me happy. I’m superficial. Whatever“. How did I respond to this? “Just don’t forget!”, I replied, “products are made in the factory, but brands are created in the mind” (Waltor Landor).
We both simultaneously looked at each other with an “I agree & can’t believe it” smile. This brings us to my afterthought reflections.

Ambivalence is one intriguing & largely interesting state of mind or feeling. As defined by the free online dictionary:

“Beautiful but also the most uncomfortable” & “they just make me feel fabulous” - Taline
Beauty & fabulous feelings at the expense of comfort? Indeed, through this dialogue, we can really see how mental satisfaction is winning in a battle against physical satisfaction. But Taline is fully conscious of this mental force at work. In fact, she hereself labels this as  a ”sad reality”. She is fully aware of this phenomenon, and it seems to be contributing or feeding into her negative attitude or feelings towards brands. In turn, this creates a state of cognitive dissonance in her mind. It’s similar to a love and hate relationship experience, driving or driven by this feeling of ambivalence. In addition, she goes further into stating that the fashion business has turned her into a “monster”. A very strong choice of word!

But do such negative attitudes have a negative impact on Taline’s consumption habits? No, seems to be the answer. Regardless of this sad reality & even if she is not comfortable wearing Louboutin shoes, Taline is nevertheless planning on purchasing another pair! Surprising? Obvious? Really? Why not! Shoes make her happy! Her pereived value of positive feelings such as happiness, fabulous & beauty outweighs her feelings of comfort. Remember that there is no clear cut definition of the term happiness. Each person is free to define it & experience it his or her own way. But keep in mind that she is doing it for herself & not for others. In fact, Taline is a person who enjoys wearing brand products without  visible logo/name. She is very discreet in her luxurious apparel. This leads me to believe her statement: “it makes me feel better. It’s not for anyone, it’ for me”. In sum, our dialogue really portrays the coexistence of opposing attitudes regarding her perception on brands/labels. I use the word perception since the evaluation of a brand may be subjective & thus may vary  from one person to the another.

Labels & Love?
Our gaze & smile at the end said it all: Although we are both luxury brand addicts, (her to a higher degree as compared to me) we acknowledge the potential presence of “brand wash”. But since “brands are created in the mind”, wouldn’t this mean, to some extent, that we are agreeing to some kind of “brain wash”? Can we exagerate by saying that brand or label wash is synonymous to brain wash, especially in a materialistic 21st century? Regardless of whether the answer to the question is yes or no, consumers like Taline will downplay the negative feelings they have towards brands by reinforcing the positive prestigious feelings it provides to them. After all, luxury loyals may be indifferent in the face of ambivalence. Aware of the negative & positive & yet agreeing to be in a love and hate relationship, positively and negatively impacting the sense of self, self identity & personality traits? Taline couldn’t have said it through a better quote: “shoes make me happy. I’m superficial. Whatever”!

Do other luxury consumers also feel fabulous when wearing such shoes? Could it be that this brand or any other type of higher end label is selling feelings and personality of love & happiness? If so, what are its’ characteristics driving and influencing the perception, personality and identity of self? Or inversly, what type of personality characteristics are more likely to motivate  person to even purchase products from this brand? Does congruency reign between the personality, identity & ideal self of the consumer & that of the brand? What do you think? Comments, questions? Ideas? Feel free to share!

*Taline is one amongst millions of luxury consumers around the world. This article’s objective is not to generalize to the entire population of luxurious consumers. Rather, it aims to highlight few themes from an interesting conversation over a mutually fascinating subject with my lovely 8 years long friendship with this girl  <3 Thank you hun for allowing me to write & publish your words & pictures!

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